Thursday, October 8, 2015

Pet Peevs - Part 1.

Today's list of things that peev me off :

1 - "trends are moving forwards".......well, duh, that's what a trend is. It's an increasing occurrence.

2 - "down the track" about 'up the track' or 'no track', or how about 'up shit creek in a barb wire canoe'. Maybe, 'in the future' might suffice ?

3 - Why is it that mankind can land 12 people who walked on the moon in 3 years since 1969 and yet I still can't make a reliable mobile phone call between Heallesville and Belgrave, or Croydon and Rosebud. Is technology going backwards ?

4 - The amount of money spent by the US on Iraq / Iran wars since 2001 = One Trillion Dollars = If you spent $1 million a day since Jesus was born, you would have not spent $1 trillion by now. No wonder the world and especially the US is in a financial depression.......and meanwhile there are still starving, uneducated, homeless people the world over !

5 - People suffering the floods in Northern NSW are having to wait eight working days for the Insurance Assessors to attend. What ? are they traveling by friggin' horse ? 8 working days really means a fortnight, what? How come the Stock Exchange operates 7 days a week, isn't that working ? And isn't Sunday a Thursday somewhere else in the world ?

6 - 100 kmh speed signs. That is actually 62 mph old school, not very fast at all. A horse trots at around 9 mph and a person walks at about 3 mph. If speed limits continue to be lowered we might as well all learn to crawl - and get booked for it !

7 - What is the fascination with watching bicycle racing on tv ? Is it for the rippling bodies under shiny lycra or is it for the view of those shiny man-bums. No, it's really for the thrill of waiting for a spill and seeing all that shiny plastic melt into their skin as they hit the bitumen. Silly fuckers. And have they never heard heard of the increased risk of genital cancer and lower sperm counts as a result of a bound and heated up pocket rocket package ?

8 - What are bicyclists doing on roads anyway ? It's only a result of legislation banning them from footpaths because they were a danger to pedestrians. But now they're a friggin' danger to other motorists. And they pay no registration, have their own shiny-bum bike lanes and don't obey the road rules !

9 - "transparency',,,,,actually means that you can see right through it all the way. to the bullshit. So how does that make it any better than real bullshit ?

10 - "yes /no"..........actually techno-speak for "yes I agree with you but I can't wait for you to shut up so that I can have my say".

..............and that's only today !