A Natural Born Loser

So, you say

you are a natural born loser

shame on you, as you let your life run away

with all your choices

and yet you chose to be a chooser.


Take away my alternatives and you take away yours

give me the point of a knife

and I will show you too many doors.

scream in pain

as you may be an alliterate pig

pegged on all fours.


You can't help but display

oh my golly someone shoulda' had you splayed.

and yet you flaunt your disgusting for me

let everyone see how not you could be

maybe your mum and dad would be dismayed.


So you say I'm a natural born user

as you, idling by

take the choices in life

as is your easy.

passing from the womb to the grave.


Are you really that sure of all the choices you made

that you chose the best to be on display.

go to your altar and genuflect

reminisce on all the choices you reject

pass over all your rights and

piss on everything within your sight.


Do you wanna' be a dog, be a slave

pack your belongings in disarray

we're leaving today on the first train that may

take a long journey past all that you delayed.

on a fast track to nowhere.

Strange

Isn't it strange how you pay so much to get your head in place

and yet you end up back in the same place

with a headache and an empty wallet.


I wished you had of placed me in a place

 where I was your king instead of being your slave.


Oh would give anything to be a bird, but I can't help but feel

 that you clip my wings - what is this love that makes me feel so many things?


No, but I am too attentive to my mood too keep my head focused on my attitude.

I am no longer playing with whatever it takes, my heart is sorely punctured by your stakes.

Excrement.

I have a hair growing from my ear. It bothers me.

 I would understand hairs if it had sprouted from my groin. Or my nose or my bum. But it bothers me because most folks don't closely survey my nether regions.

But not just most folks are want to probe so close or inquire of my errant hair status.

In fact it is a fact that those persons who did in fact cause my body to be so prone upon such inspection, that they ever did survive to tell the tale.

If this were the tale of the tortoise versus the hare then it would be true to say that those who rise early to greet the lark are those who retire early and are afraid of the dark. But I digress.

So I be here to tell the tale of the poison that lurks within and flows for ever alone and stark.

Once upon a time there was a tube of toothpaste. It sat on the shelf in the bathroom of the house I shared with my parents. I had issues unresolved at the time so I must concede it was their home.

It was purchased for a pittance but interest was cheap, so they paid in increments for the company they keep.

But every now and then I needed to empty my bowels. It was a necessity to maintain the body with which I sleep, so I derived some satisfaction from counting colours.

It was a challenge

Confusion

Are you done with stealing every thing off me

your paridograms and your parallelograms

they are your way of letting me know it's usual

to use your expression of fate that I might not relate to

everything that I think is normal.

While the vapours of your illusion

they seem to complete my illusion

and let me sleep with my decaying confusion.

I have no fear why I am here

except that I be a mathematical delusion

that compels me to believe

that my faith is a complete illusion..

Do you often delay the strokes of your fork

allowing me a sense of confusion

whilst you know that I will follow

my innate sense of self of retribution.

Please follow me god

for you know what of I am made of

I and yet it's best not to be delayed

from the stitches that remain frayed..

And you expect me to be slow

with my decision - because you know

that my fate will get even

with this mortal soul I am leaving.

Passage.

I just want to get drunk

and let the world

look after me

but it won't.

I can't afford the Ferryman

to take me across the void

past all I need

and all that I don't.

It is all I can't afford.

and all the the debts I don't want

except dipping me naked

in the font.

Grab my Achilles

like you grab my dick

and offer me many choices

of all I can't pick.

Your passage of rites

it belies me fame

and try as I may

the game ends the same.

Almighty provider

why do you jest

with my long life

when I have a difficulty to rest.

I take my my steps

with utmost care

why do you tease me

with all that I know is not there.

And try as I may

to comprehend

and play the chords

when will this journey end ?

This symphony so pretty

is tiresome my Lord

I have already spent

all I can afford.

Am I the result

of your intentions

to cast me astray

when you know that solitary I will stay.

And you will beckon me

I know, from my grave

so why is it not sufficient

for me to be so efficient ?

I take so much care

why not do you ?